8 Things You Should Stop Saying to Skinny Black Girls (Like, Right Now)
Throughout my twenty-five years of being a skinny girl, I've heard some really random and bizarre statements from people who may very well believe I don't have feelings or a heart (after all, skinny women are evil according to Mo'Nique). Some of the statements are out of curiosity, while others are blatantly rude or offensive.
If you have been a victim of the statements below or guilty of saying them to a skinny girl be sure to comment and tell us about your experiences:
"You need to put some meat on your bones!"
For some skinny girls, this can be either a hurtful or annoying phrase. It can tell a girl that her current size is not favorable or adequate. It can also create a sense of annoyance if she has already attempted to put "meat on her bones."
"You probably can fit anything."
Girl, bye. Contrary to popular belief, there are not always clothes who fit skinny girls. Places like Forever 21 and H&M may have clothes made for small figures, but sometimes if you happen to be small with an above average breast or butt, then finding clothes can be complicated. Additionally, those who are extremely small may have to shop in the kid’s section to find clothes that are form fitting.
"You're shaped like a white girl."
Having a skinny figure while being black is sometimes associated with the desire to become white or emulate a "white girl" figure. Remember people can't control their genetics; if a girl is born naturally skinny, it's who she is. Besides, we shouldn't categorize shape by race; we're all beautifully made in different sizes and shapes regardless of the skin color we are all in.
"You're so skinny for a black girl!
What exactly is the most appropriate size for a black girl? 10, 12, 14? 2X? Although it may be odd to see an extremely skinny black girl, don't gawk or make a huge deal about her weight. It can be embarrassing, offensive, and outright annoying. Saying this phrase is almost equivalent to saying, "You're so pretty for a black girl!" No one is so small or pretty for anything. Let us be beautiful. Not for our race, but for being a functional human being that deserves to be respected outside of a lens of a body image with racial undertones.
"Skinny girls are evil."
We are not evil. We are misunderstood. Mo'Nique embedded the false in doctrine of "skinny women are evil" in the heads of women over a size eight and it never fails to come up in a conversation. To be fair, let's drop the name calling and just pick and choose who we befriend or trust regardless of her weight class.
"I bet you don't have to exercise and eat whatever you want."
Sure! I eat candy for breakfast and scarf a Big Mac down every chance I get – if I only want to live to be 30 of course. Excuse my sarcasm. Everyone has a responsibility to eat healthy and exercise, including skinny women. Although physically it may appear that we do not gain a pound from excessive or unhealthy eating, poor eating habits can negatively affect our health like anyone else. Same with exercise. If we do not take the appropriate action to exercise, we are subjected to a shorter life span and a shorter tolerance for activities that require energy.
"You're cute but you're small. I prefer thick girls."
What does this even mean? Is an order of fries less attractive at McDonald’s when you're hungry because it isn't supersized? No! Basically, you're telling me that because I do not have the physical assets you deem as minimum requirements to date, I do not have potential to be the best person you've ever dated? Guess not. When skinny girls hear things like this, it is a great filter for dating prospects. Next!
"Skinny girls don't know how to cook."
Oh really? Great, more food for me! The notion that skinny girls can't cook baffles me. It's as if our skinniness makes us too incompetent to read a recipe or follow directions. While you think skinny girls can't cook, I'll be eating (awesome) meals prepared with my own hands, thank you very much.
Did I miss anything? My name is Whitney L. Barkley and I am the creator of The Skinny Black Girl's Code. Drop me a line on twitter - I'd love to hear your stories!
